still learning..

A few things I have learned in the past few weeks:
1.Don't most people have hopes and dreams? I mean, I thought everyone did. I thought everyone wanted to do better.. to strive to do better. To always want more for their family and better for their family. I'm still learning more about people everyday and I think I've learned this isn't actually true! Which AMAZES ME! I can't imagine not wanting better for Heaven or me.
2. I'm trying to learn to be less judgmental. I've noticed other people being judgmental and them not realizing that the situation isn't as close to what they think it is. That being said, it has made me wonder that maybe when I am judging other people, that I may not know their entire situation or why they do things and say things the way they do?
3. I have learned I am a victim of financial bondage. We learned in church yesterday if: you spend your money and at the end of the month don't know where it's going that you are a victim. You need to manage your finances better, in the way God says you should. Read proverbs :) I am sad to say that is definitely me.

So I will be working on the things listed. Do you have anything you could be teaching yourself? Are you judgmental? Do you not strive to do better? Do you not manage your finances the way God says you should? Think about it. :)

hehe

So I'm SUPPOSED TO be blogging about why men and women are so different but I'll have to do that later because I don't really have time to do it now. I promise I'll do it later though. I am sitting at work super bored and we've had... 5 people come in here and 2 people buy things, totaling to all of 18 dollars? Geez.. I wanna go somewhere besides here. It's so nice out. Life has been crazy lately, ever changing! Richie has been pretty upset because I asked him to move, and I'm serious this time and it hurts him, and I feel bad but I can't keep being with someone to make them feel better while the whole time, I'm unhappy. Ill talk about that more later too, I gtg I'm closing the store early, this is rediculous!

sadness

It is truely sad when you have been with someone for many years and wake up one day, and decide that this person your sleeping beside isn't the person you want to sleep beside for the rest of your life. This is the sort of thing I've been feeling for a while and have been trying so hard to ignore. It's been going on for months. I guess, really, it doesnt just all the sudden happen one morning but slowly over time changes. When this happens, then it makes you start to look back at all the previous people, particularly the ones you enjoyed being with, and wonder if maybe one of them were the right one? Did you pick the wrong one? Did you let go of the one God intended you for? Or are they still yet to come? Or is the one your with really the one your supposed to be with? Maybe it'll all work out? Why does love have to be so complicated? If God has picked someone for me to be with, why can't he just tell me who it is already before I make a mistake?

ugh

So just a quick update... School starts back Monday, I will be taking Ethics and Public Speaking, which I dread because I hate speaking in front of people. I get embarrassed easily and I'm too shy. I don't see why I need to take a class on public speaking just to be a nurse but whatever, I have to take it so I hope it goes well. Also, I have been sick with some kinda stomach bug that I acquired sometime this past week. I woke up yesterday puking and all kinds of stuff and had a terrible migraine. I missed work and went to the doctor and they gave me some kind of prescription nausea medicine and ultram (?) for my headache. One of these medicines cause me to be very sleepy so I have been sleepy all day. And today was my great-grandmothers... funeral type thing. I say it that way because she wanted her body donated to science and so we didnt bury her or anything but they showed pictures and had like mini-church. After which we went to my grandmothers (her daughter) and everyone ate and stuff and left (leaving their messes everywhere for my grandmother to clean up). So, I stayed and did all the dishes and stuff, I mean how retarded, her mother just died so you go to her house, eat, and then leave your crap everywhere, how heartless. Anywho, people will be people I guess this shouldn't be so surprising but for some reason it is. Richie will be on his way home soon. He literally never went to sleep last night. He talked me to death for three hours last night about all his problems and trying to figure out how he wants to fix them. Which is good, it is always good to notice the things you need to fix and try to figure out how, but I guess after I went to bed he stayed up thinking about all of them and never got any sleep. I'm guessing when he gets home he will be going to bed pronto. My friends are going out tonight, and I kinda wanna go, I mean Richie will be going to sleep as soon as he gets here so I dont see why I wouldn't be able to go but I dont think he will want me to so I doubt I will be going. Anyway, Heaven's hungry so .... until next time...

summer...

So in two weeks I will offically have been in college for a year! Time flies so fast! This summer I will be taking public speaking and sociology. Blah, it all sounds boring but that's life. Anyway, I did get a D in my Bio class which means I have to take it over in the fall, I HATE knowing I have to take a class Ive already sat through again, but hopefully it will be with a teacher who is worth listening to. Heaven's gymnastics recital is tonite, I hope she does okay because apparently a lot of our family will be coming to watch her. The previous gymnastics class she took, at the end family was aloud to come watch a class (because usually parents aren't aloud to sit and watch, its distracting to the kids) but anyway so richie's parents, richie and I went and watched her and she CLAMMED UP, I mean... embarassed me, she was the only one not listening to the teacher, rolling around in the floor and just completely acting up, so anyway I pray she doesn't do that at her recital tonight, we have had numerous talks about it, but she is three and completely unpredictable!!! Ive peeked through the door of her normal classes and she usually listens well. I think it's because of everyone watching so I hope she doesn't do it this time, there will be alot more people watching. Anyway, Ill definitely post how it went:)

being sick sucks, so I will ramble on...

I haven't blogged in a while, I actually haven't had much to talk about. I started my part time job at my aunt's store, that I can take Heaven with me to. This week at school is our final exams, and I am currently sick with I dunno what, but... I know I'm sick. Being sick sucks so bad! Plus, with the swine flu going around, of course thats the first thing I think I have lol, although I know that's not what I have..I'm pretty sure it's a sinus infection of some kind. Heaven has a 2 hour gymnastics class today, so I guess I'll either be taking that time to go grocery shopping or studying for my exams, I know which one I should be doing but that doesn't mean anything. I went out this past saturday with all my girls to Saddle Ridge, it was fun but I think that's where I got sick from, so many people there, so many germs! AHH! lol and with the swine flu in Virginia who knows where it'll pop up. Anywho...I gotta go lay on the couch or something..ugh

With the Good comes the bad

So I have good news, and bad news. (Which one first)..hmm.. Well good news is, I found a part time job, working at my Aunt's craft store. I'm so excited because it's super easy and I can even take Heaven there with me, YAY! And then, on down times throughout the day, I can study for school. Any extra money is awesome.

Bad news is, I think I'm almost completely positive I am going to fail my A and P Biology class! Ugh, my teachers suck so bad, and I'm just not getting it and finals are next week. In order to get into the nursing program I have to have atleast a C in bio and I don't think thats happening!

Anyonr good at Bio?! Help!!!